It's My Time in 2009!

So what? I'm a day late:) That is just my nature. I've always had my own timing. Come on what do you expect from a girl who was almost a month late to the day?!

This new year is bringing fourth so many ideas and plans that I am going to focus on ME this year. That might sound kind of strange considering that I am a single 27 year old. But it's true. I find it easier, and waaaaaay less stressful, to help others than to try and figure out what God has planned for me. Please allow me to explain. I believe that we do have a pre-set direction given to us by God. Along the way choices present themselves and it's up to us as will-given individuals to discern which choice to make. I've been feeling lately that I've made a ton of wrong choices on my life path so far. If my thoughts are valid, this would explain why I've been feeling so out of touch with where I am in life.

I realized over these last few holidays that I take care of EVERYONE but myself. I never ask for help when helping others and I feel like an utter failure if I am unable to help someone. I'm not sure where that character trait came from, but I'd like to pack it up in a nice package and return it to the sender! I love the feeling of helping someone, inspiring, teaching, nurturing or caring for people but I need to learn to recognize when I am getting over extended. I realize that God gave be the gift of helping others and I am thankful for that. What I need to do is find a way to input it into my life where it is best utilized.

I was challenged to find a word that will help me become more in tune with my life path. The word I have chosen is PATIENCE. Given all that I said above, patience is so appropriate. I can think of a million ways to use this word and how much I can learn from it. When I look at people who inspire me they hold A TON of patience. They use it in their work life, their home life, in their own life, in how they handle other peoples lives and most importantly in their relationship with God.

I am going to focus on my health this year. Not sure how much I am going to be able to accomplish in this area since I don't have health insurance, but I will do my best to eat better, work my butt off and love with all of my heart.

Lastly, I want to pray that I God protects my heart. I feel a little tainted regarding relationships and marriage. I have been in a struggle between my head and my heart for a while now and would like my heart to heal and my head to shut up.....every once in a while that is:) I want to be a wife and a mom some day but I haven't felt ready until recently. I haven't had the best relationships to model after and now know how much work is involved, I know what I do want in a relationship and what I don't want in a relationship, I know how important it is to grow in your personal relationship with God before you are married and how important it is to keep some of your individuality.